So so so tired…

The last month has been that usual “last month of the longest school holidays ever” month.

I have managed to get through and push my way through the month as I knew there was always something that needed to be done or something or someone that needed my attention. I have had some successes, in hosting a few dinner parties, which was wonderful and I thoroughly enjoyed, and then the next day feeling “normal”. I was silently proud of myself in doing so. But yesterday it all came crashing down. Yesterday afternoon, around 4pm to be exact.

It started with just this overwhelming heaviness and pain in my legs, I tried to combat it with a rest and icing my legs, I was meant to go and have a drink with some friends, but I couldn’t manage it. As the night progressed the pain and heaviness just continued all through my body and I could hardly keep my eyes open, but the pain was keeping me from falling asleep (That and the fact I REALLY wanted to watch Nadal in the AO semi-final). I ended up having to take an endone, lyrica and melatonin to numb myself enough to fall asleep (only got to the 2nd set before having to go to bed L ).

This morning I have woken up tired, like I never even closed my eyes last night. This part of MS sucks (actually there is really no part that doesn’t). I feel like I lose out as a friend, a wife and a mum. I feel useless. Now before the pity party starts, please don’t. I know I am NOT useless, I just FEEL useless. I am just having one of those days. I know Lemtrada will not fix these days, I wish it did though. I am missing out on too much otherwise.