Where there are highs...

So, yesterday I woke up with a great big ugly cold sore on my cheek. Now, I am not a vain person, but my confidence is rather rocked by having this. I feel blah and to be honest, I don't want to leave the confines of my home. I would stay in bed, if it wasn't essential that I get up, have a shower and be a part of my family. The cold sore is expected, with a non existent immune system, viruses that live in the body just surface, this is why taking an antiviral is essential during the first few months. It would have been a lot worse if I wasn't taking it.

Not only do I have a cold sore, I'm emotionally void... it doesn't take a lot for me to cry, but I don't even want to do that. Nor, do I want to laugh or be a part of the anything. If I could go to bed and not get out until this passes, I would do that. So you could say I am feeling a little low.

I am also questioning my decision to put my teaching career on hold. I miss being in the class room and

knowing that what I was doing was important. That my opinion held value and that people listened. That I was knowledgeable and, I think, pretty good at what I did. I miss that. But, I also know that this is not the right time for me to be in the classroom, with all those germs and stresses and long tiresome days. That's not what my body needs while it heals. I remind myself I am so lucky to be in a position where I can do something that allows me the flexibility and the time to heal. I love being able to work by my husband's side and to be building a business, that will continue - even after this portion of my journey is said and done.

I suppose even sunny days get cloud cover every once and a while and I sit back with the knowledge that the sun will shine again and I look forward to having it warm my face and smiling again.